Old Photos

I finally got around to scanning in some old photos I got from my trip to South Florida. You can click them to make them larger. Enjoy!

New Theme...New Life

I think we finally have some major progress with this thing (Thing=Film). I finally sat down and watched home movies for hours and realized that this film is not just about two brothers and their differences, but about an entire family.

I went back to the original idea on why I wanted to make this film, and answered my own question: I wanted to make a film that showed my family how we have forgotten about Blair, and how he hasn't forgotten about us. Although he has to take some of the blame, we have to take just as much. How does a family so close, forget to include one of its own?

By the way, this progress has allowed several key scenes take shape. Which is always a good thing. I hope you can spread the word about this film, and continue following it along the way. Expect a finished short documentary in May, and who knows maybe we will have a feature possibility down the road.

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Keep checking back for more!!

Theme is like flying in a dream

For the past month I have continued to make progress on my film, but recently have found myself come to a halt. So I dug through a book a good friend of mine suggested prior to making this film by Tristine Rainer entitled Your Life As Story. This book is more for autobiographical writing, but relates in many ways to making personal documentaries. During the read through, I found a very interesting excerpt I'd like to share that may help me (and others) along the way.

You, too, may find a time where you hit a memory website where the options are overwhelming, and you will slow to a halt. That is the time to retrace your steps to figure out your theme from what you have set down. Once you've discovered your thematic string, you can stretch it forward as a guideline for completing your work.

This inspired start and stop sudden pattern is like that of a recurrent flying dream I had as a child. I knew how to soar as long as I didn't think about how I was flying. Arms outstretched , feet kicking occasionally as when swimming, I swept over roads and trees, over swimming pools and lawn furniture, out over open fields of rye grass. I was exhilerated and confident; none of the wolves and demons that haunted my nightmares could get me up there. Then--why couldn't I learn?--I made the very mistake I had tried to remember not to repeat. I began to wonder, how could I be flying? I tried to study my own technique so I wouldn't crash, but by becoming self conscious, I forfeited my buoyancy. My body lowered toward the ground like a balloon losing air until in despair I felt wet grass on my feet. Over charged with the adrenaline of panic, I froze, as a wolf, mouth slavering as in a cartoon, charged out of the bushes. I had to force my little girl legs to move, until I could get them to run, run for my life, though I could not leave the ground.

As the wolf gained on me, I consciously replayed in my mind how it was I had been able to fly. I would analyze my technique again, even though it was that mistake that had grounded me in the first place. And mystery of mysteries, I would remember! The very intellectual effort that had lost me my flight in the first place was the only way I could retrieve it.

Writing from inspiration is like dream flying; in the midst of it, it seems nothing can ever ground you. This is the transcendence that lures and addicts one to writing. Woe to those who stop in the rush of inspiration to think about why the writing is working...On the other hand, it is when you find yourself grounded, when you have lost your way and doubt yourself, that it is valuable to go back to search for the intellectual construct of theme in your work.

Ok so before I get a cease and desist letter from Penguin Putnam Inc. I will stop there. But if you think about this except, you can replace writing with editing or filmmaking, and apply this to every film being made.

Rainer also suggests that theme is not just one single element, but it is the conflict between two underlying concepts or values that propel a work forward. So I listed a few statements of theme my film has that conflict with each other that may help me get out of this hole I am in.

1. My family doesn't seem to believe that Gordon and Blair have an issue or issues that have caused their relationship to suffer.
vs.
My struggle to actually show that something is interfering with their relationship, and try to bridge that gap.

2. The fear of making a film that doesn't live up to the hype it is developing
vs.
The possible success, and personal satisfaction it could have if the film is actually made.

3. The fear of disappointing Gordon by exposing certain characteristics he may posses.
vs.
Allowing Blair to finally be understood.

I think #1 seems to be the theme that has been with me since the inception of this film. #2 and #3 are just as strong, and maybe each one will be a subtheme in the film.

I have also posted a personal best in: Longest Blog Entry. Thanks for reading!

Available on Amazon.com
You Life As Story
Tristine Rainer

The New Full Length Trailer

If you missed the premiere of the film's new trailer on facebook, check it out here!

Close By That Much Trailer from Corey Frost on Vimeo.

The Joy of Filmmaking

Every once in a while, I wonder why I've wanted to be a filmmaker. And for the longest time I could never really answer that particular question. I would always say, "I just was born to be one," or "It was something that came natural to me."

As I edit my full length trailer on this cold late 1:18 a.m. night/morning, I find my self coming closer to an answer. This documentary has pushed my level of thinking to the ultimate peak. Never have I once began to care so much about a project than I do right now. To me this is something that no other subject, or career can do. Math can't really make you cry; (Unless you're me and really bad at it). Working at a bank can't give you that satisfaction of seeing someone react to a work of art you've created. But don't get me wrong, I am not disrespecting those professions. I just feel there is really nothing like filmmaking in the world. And this documentary I am working on has begun to open up my eyes to that.

Whether or not this film becomes successful, or widely viewed, it has done something. And that something is make me realize why I am walking through this journey in life.

Rapid Reaction from NYC

Just yesterday I was walking around the sloppy rain filled big apple for the first time in my life. If you haven't ever been, make an effort to before you get old and don't want to travel. But the trip wasn't necessarily for my inner tourist, it was to talk with my Great Uncle Blair for the first time on camera.

He lives in Vauxhall, New Jersey at South Mountain Rehab Center. Basically, it's a nursing home. But Blair is more than capable of taking care of himself, but he recently had a triple by-pass surgery, added on with a knee replacement which has landed him in this place. One might say his HIV has caused his ailments, but he made it known that HIV has only given him a pudgy stomach. Otherwise HIV has done nothing to him.

Before this trip/talk with Blair, both of us had our apprehensions. I was worried he wouldn't open up to me, and that everything I had perceived in this relationship between him and his brother/family were untrue. This trip allowed that apprehension to disappear. We both opened up to each other talking about anything we could in this 4 hour visit. I even had lunch with the rest of the patients at the center. He showed me his now permanent home, introduced me to nurses and patients, and I showed him some of my work as a filmmaker, plus some old home movies. It was a give and receive day. We couldn't catch up on all aspects of life since we haven't seen each other in years, but the plan is to keep visiting, and continuing to share. I would say we both enjoyed this eye opening moment.

Once I dig threw the few hours of footage I shot, I will have more of in depth blog entry. In the meantime, if you haven't, read up on what this film is about, and subscribe or follow the blog. I think it might turn into something special.

Main Characters

Blair Frost

Blair is the identical twin brother of Gordon Frost. Both, who are at age 75, have lived completely different lives. Blair seemed to have lived life trying to find out who he really is. He realized early on that he was homosexual. But the insecurity of how others viewed him, haunted him. Blair later dropped out of college, and became an alcoholic. He was diagnosed with HIV, and he slowly began to isolate himself from everyone else, keeping secrets, and lying to avoid being honest with his family.

Currently he lives in New Jersey, and has erased his dishonest past. He now vows to be honest everyday of his life, including going to Alcoholics Anonymous three times a week. But, since he is so far away from any of his family, and living in a rehabilitation home, he hasn’t been able to see them in years. “Although I may be up here alone, I pray for every single person in the family by name every night.” Blair said.



Gordon Frost

Gordon Frost is a church going family man. He has been living in South Florida for over 20 years along side of all his sons, and family. Gordon is a conservative man, who has a strong passion for his religion. Over the years, his religion seemed to have been a roadblock in the relationship between him and his twin brother Blair.

Today, Gordon may be trying to get back to how he, and his brother used to be, but at the same time they haven’t seen each other in over 5 years.